It is hard to write a blog when I am running all over. When I get home, I don’t always remember what happened, and sometimes I think Heather is probably going to write. But right now she’s probably eating supper with Mom, while Dad and Dot eat upstairs. Mom is confused about others taking care of Dad. Heather and I love them both much and try hard to balance each of their needs.

Dot is a new hired caregiver. I could see I needed the relief, because the flat in my trunk never seems to get to the repair shop, the pile of papers goes up and down but mostly up, the grumpy factor surfaced occasionally….Marilyn comes in 5 mornings a week now 8:30 to 10:30, so I don’t rush on over first thing after another sleepless night. Dot is 5 afternoons 2:30 to sometime past bedtime. So Chena here comes in the midday to love the family, vacuum, talk with Heather about garden plans & so much more.

Today Mom and I played Boggle, a word game, right next to Dad after lunch. He seemed fairly interested. When we were putting the game away, he took a pad of paper and a pencil and started trying to write. Oh guys, I tear up just thinking about how I watched him for about 10 minutes, repeatedly writing. He couldn’t quite form complete letters–to be egocentric about it, there was one page I saw him write “C,” then “H”, then tried so hard for an “E” but it kept going squiggly on him. He put that aside and tried something else. I was behind him, rubbing his back gently, crying my eyes out. It is so hard to watch.

So I thought he was trying for another way to communicate. I’m just not smart in this. I got out the books on Alzheimers, and one of them talked about other diseases which mimic or cause similar symptoms. But really I think he does have dementia and we don’t know everything to do except love him and keep him healthy, talk to him. I appreciate Diane (massage therapist) and so many others who help me. The best help is always my hub Gary.

People have been good about visiting. Sean and Ed came over this afternoon. I went grocery shopping during that, so don’t have much to report. Earlier Ron came and Dad was so interested. Laughed and talked mostly things we didn’t know what to say back. But we all talked about drainage and other issues with Dad anyway.

Yesterday others visited: Don R ran up the hill with his dog only to find Dad was in a different mode than talking. Jude and Jim came up earlier while Dad mostly slept. Jude and Jim and Mom reminisced about about old names like Sparky and Austin and Harry and others from the 1950s, 60’s and onward. Gotta say it was terrific for me, and I hope Dad got something out of it. The old homesteading days on the Ridge were one of a kind, and Jude and Jim were there.

Dad was fairly strong today, compared to some. He was interested in his mail and occasionally talked about things, gesticulated, laughed. He enjoyed Heather’s smoked Yukon salmon at lunch. Later, he re-read the Kalavala book Jim B. had brought him. I think we are all buoyed by visitors, writers, the community out there who is there for all of us.

–Chena